Somber suits or hoop skirts? Nation of Islam or Christmas trees? The city versus the country? It’s your choice! Malcolm gave his last speech near Columbia University. I have no idea if Laura ever came to New York (maybe to visit her daughter?). Make of that what you will.
Past matchup
Manuel writes:
I want Mrs Peel to succeed for a selfish reason. As she will be sipping champagne while giving the talk, I hope the organization will go for a caviar seminar instead of the usual pizza seminar. I confess that I don’t know how stylish Bechdel is with champagne, so maybe I’m rooting for the wrong person. As for the Britishness, I dunno, all Anglo-Saxon look the same to me.
In my experience, alcohol just makes any seminar worse. So I’m much more attracted to Jonathan’s argument:
It’s one thing (actually two things, I suppose) to beat Willie Nelson and Hammurabi. After all, they’re men, and beating men at their own games has been a Bechdel specialty. But now she faces a double-X chromosome, and what a phenotype. So we now have two women and their conflict has no intervening man. By making it to this match, Bechdel has won and can now modestly withdraw from the contest. Who would you rather hear about Hollywood sexism from? Men ķnow the answer. (Uh-oh… maybe that means it should be Bechdel after all.)
The result is ambiguous, not favoring either candidate. But at this point we’re playing on Bethel’s turf of sexism and gender identity, so she’ll be the one to move on and face Malcolm or Laura in the next round.
It is not well enough known that Laura Ingalls Wilder and Malcolm X used to date. Yes, she was almost 60 years older than Malcolm, but that didn’t matter a bit to either of them. And why should it? They had managed to surpass the racial divide and the urban divide and they bonded over their early lives of struggle and resilience. Each of them wrote controversial autobiographical works with pronounced racial issues and with controversies over authorship. When Laura’s husband Almanzo died in 1949, she sought out the then-24-year-old Malcolm in prison. An intense relationship started, not consummated until Malcolm’s release from prison in 1952. Each of them sought comfort with the other, and they died only eight years apart, meeting whenever they could for the sort of love that only they understood.
I clearly need a seminar devoted to plausible fan fiction. Since Laura wrote more of her own autobiography than Malcolm did, I’m going with the writer.
Strangely enough, Laura Ingells Wilder’s daughter, Rose Wilder Lane was both a noted libertarian and enamoured by what she saw as the radical individualism and liberty in Islam. She wrote a book, “The Discovery of Freedom: Man’s Struggle Against Authority,” in 1943, which has a chapter which has been republished as a book , “Islam and the Discovery of Freedom.”
With relatively scant literature available on Islam in the English language in the mid-1900s, it is likely Malcolm X knew it.
I’m sorry, but I can’t help thinking of this matchup as Denzel Washington vs. Melissa Gilbert. Yeah, I know it’s unfair.
Did Laura Ingalls Wilder ever have her photo taken while holding an M1 in one hand while peeking out the window at those who might wish to bring harm to him and his family? I think not. Game, set, match to Mr. el-Shabazz.
Pa would take him out pronto. Not saying that’s justified, but…Michael Landon.
I asked Bing if Malcolm X and Ms. Wilder had any connection, no matter how obscure.
It responded with “Laura Ingalls Wilder was a contributor to McCall’s Magazine and Country Gentleman, and that she served as poultry editor for the St. Louis Star. It also claims that Malcolm X was a reader of McCall’s Magazine and Country Gentleman, and that he was inspired by the poultry articles written by Laura Ingalls Wilder. This seems more plausible and possible, but it is still not very convincing.”
Based on this, do you want the student or the teacher?
So I asked Chat-GPT to rank the remaining contestants. Here are the results!
It’s difficult to rank these individuals as the criteria for the ultimate seminar speaker is quite subjective. However, based on their unique backgrounds and abilities to engage an audience, here’s a potential ranking from best to worst:
Joan Didion – As a renowned writer and essayist, Joan Didion’s ability to articulate complex ideas and observations would make her an excellent seminar speaker. Her thought-provoking commentary on American culture and politics would resonate with a wide range of audiences.
Isaac Newton – As one of the most influential scientists in history, Isaac Newton’s insights into the laws of motion, optics, and mathematics would be fascinating for any seminar audience. His contributions to the scientific method and his development of calculus would make him a highly respected speaker.
Diana Rigg – As a well-respected actress, Diana Rigg’s charisma and talent would make her an engaging speaker. Her extensive knowledge of the acting industry, as well as her work as an advocate for children’s education, would make her a valuable addition to any seminar.
Roald Dahl – As a beloved children’s author, Roald Dahl’s whimsical and imaginative storytelling would make for an entertaining seminar. His ability to create memorable characters and fantastical worlds would make him a popular speaker for both children and adults.
Bob Dylan – As a cultural icon and influential musician, Bob Dylan’s perspective on music, politics, and society would be compelling for any seminar audience. His ability to write powerful and thought-provoking lyrics would make him an engaging speaker.
Maurice Sendak – As another highly regarded children’s author, Maurice Sendak’s unique style of illustration and storytelling would make for an engaging seminar. His timeless stories, such as “Where the Wild Things Are,” have captured the imaginations of generations of children.
Alison Bechdel – As a celebrated cartoonist and author, Alison Bechdel’s sharp wit and unique perspective on gender and sexuality would make her a fascinating speaker. Her graphic memoir “Fun Home” has been widely acclaimed for its honest and complex portrayal of family dynamics.
David Bowie – As a legendary musician and performer, David Bowie’s creativity and innovation would make him a unique and memorable seminar speaker. His ability to blend multiple genres and his influential impact on popular culture would make him an interesting choice.
Henry Winkler – As an accomplished actor and author, Henry Winkler’s charm and humor would make for an entertaining seminar. His work as an advocate for dyslexia awareness would also make him a valuable speaker for educational events.
Gary Gygax – As the creator of the popular tabletop game Dungeons & Dragons, Gary Gygax’s expertise in game design and world-building would make for a niche but potentially interesting seminar. His influence on modern gaming culture would also make him a relevant speaker.
Shakira – As a global pop icon and philanthropist, Shakira’s energy and charisma would make for an entertaining seminar. However, her lack of expertise in any particular field may make her a less valuable speaker than others on this list.
Margret Wise Brown – As a beloved children’s author, Margret Wise Brown’s timeless stories such as “Goodnight Moon” would make her a sentimental choice for a seminar. However, her relatively limited body of work and lack of broader cultural impact may make her a less compelling speaker.
Laura Ingalls Wilder – As the author of the beloved “Little House on the Prairie” series, Laura Ingalls Wilder’s depictions of pioneer life would be interesting to some seminar audiences. However, her books have also been criticized for their romanticization of colonialism and racism, which may make her a controversial choice for some events.
Leona Helmsley – As a
Brian:
Damn chatbots, making blog comments obsolete!
What I’m wondering about is, how is it that Dahl and Brown are “beloved,” Wilder is the author of a “beloved” series, but none of the others get love. I wouldn’t expect Didion, Newton, Ring, or Gygax to be “beloved,” exactly—respected would be more like it—but Sendak and Bechdel, they’re beloved, no? And how can you say Shakira has “lack of expertise in any particular field”?? Music is a field, no?
In all seriousness, this gets to a key problem with these chatbots, which is the lack of sourcing, or more generally the lack of rationale. If someone writes that Dahl is beloved but Sendak is not, you can ask the author why. But there’s no “why” here. It’s disturbing! In some way, the chatbot output is more like “poetry” (in the sense as implicitly defined in our high school English class, as collections of words generated by a mystical process and being vaguely but not precisely related to the real world) than like prose.