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A. J. Liebling vs. Dorothy Parker (2); Steve Martin advances

As Dalton wrote:

On one hand, Serena knows how to handle a racket. But Steve Martin knows how to make a racket with some strings stretched taught over a frame. Are you really gonna bet against the dude who went to toe-to-toe Kermit the Frog in racket making duel?

Today we have an unseeded eater vs. the second-seeded wit. That said, Liebling was very witty, at least in his writing. And Parker—I don’t know how she was as an eater, but she sure knew how to drink. As did Liebling. So the two are evenly matched.

Again, here’s the bracket and here are the rules.


  1. Dzhaughn says:

    After the Seance, we were chatting about the inspiration for this tournament. I said I thought Bruno was just a minor intellectual swindler rather than a real threat. Dorothy replied:

    I used to think Latour was just something on a Schwinn dealer’s list*, but that was before I saw Julia’s child Oscar wildly strong-arm Lance with an ephronedrine-filled syringe merrily down the Streep, past a sidewalk cafe where the turing Pele and big bejeweled #23, in Brooks’ Brothers suits, were yakking over Smirnoff Martinis, eating a pile of franks, caesar salads, and some weirder dishes. James was on the phone, taking the TV network to hell and back over “letting that degenerate George Karl off the hook” for some remark, when, from behind a bush, sudden as a python, out springs teen-aged Babe D.-Z, among others! That geng didn’t look like they were here to serenade us with arias from Yardbird, that jazz oprah about Parker! No, they were there to revolt–air their own grievances–and when he stood to object, Babe just shoved LeBron and all his LeBling back onto LaPlace where he sat: Oof!


    OKFine, I admit I got practically nowhere on the “horticulture” motif. That’s why we need the great lady at the seminar.

    • Jan says:

      Interesting, but you completely missed Pierre Fermat, sitting at the horrible table 4, eating his caraway seed cake!

      • Dzhaughn says:

        Sorry, second round contestants only, in the interest of brevity.

        “…Garcon! he shouted. Then, in a huff, King James rolled up his seedy fur mat, and carried it away, caked in sweat. He headed to the station, prepared to bourdainy train at all. His note to her? Might as well Burnett. He paused to calm himself; she was hardly to Blaine. Maybe it was better to give her short schiff now than to allow this bile to deepen any fischer between them. Anyway, he knew that she wouldn’t letterman get away that easily. ‘OMG! Oliver!’, he realized, for the first time.” sheesh.

        I do not know the man Del brought / but he sure repeats himself a lot.

    • Martha (Smith) says:

      Not a bad job of getting almost everything but the kitchen sink in.

  2. Jonathan (another one) says:

    First New Yorker showdown, just to see who will be taking on Veronica Geng in the finals. All the other contestants are just for show. I’m going with Liebling, because Parker wasn’t even the best New Yorker writer of her generation, being edged out by Benchley. Liebling dominated his era. If it comes down to Liebling vs. Geng, we’ll just exhume Harold Ross and make him pick.

  3. Not Trampis says:

    Steve Martin, surely Dino rather than Steve

  4. Ethan Bolker says:

    Only one of these two can guarantee a glib line seminar.

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